Doctor's Orders

Brett sent me a newspaper clipping. I don't know where it's from, so I can't credit it properly, but here's the text:

An eyeful a day keeps the doctor away
By JONATHAN HAYTER
Staring at women's breasts is good for men's health and makes them live longer, a new survey reveals. Researchers have discovered that a 10-minute ogle at women's breasts is as healthy as half-an-hour in the gym.
A five year study of 200 men found that those who enjoyed a longing look at busty beauties had lower blood pressure, less heart disease and slower pulse rates compared to those who did not get their daily eyeful.
Dr Karen Weatherby, who carried out the German study, wrote in the New England Journal of Medicine:
"Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics workout. Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation. There is no question that gazing at breasts makes men healthier. Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of a stroke and heart attack in half. We believe that by doing so consistently, the average man can extend his life four to five years."

Now, I was intrigued by this - from a health point of view, of course! - and I did some simple calculations.
The good doctor suggests that consistent "exercise" could extend the average man's life by 5 years. Let's assume that "consistent" means daily 10-minute sessions (as performed in the study) from the age of 20 to 80 - for 60 years.

5 years is:
5 * 365 * 24 * 60 = 2628000 minutes.

"Consistent" exercise is:
60 * 365 * 10 = 219000 minutes.

2628000/219000 = 12

So, by my calculations, every 1 minute spent looking at boobs adds 12 minutes to your lifespan! *sigh* The things one has to do for one's health...